We often see that a "love relationship" is not always "that loving." This is due to a lack of understanding of what a love relationship can mean for both partners in terms of "spiritual awareness."
When one gets into a relationship, one does so out of a desire that this one person will bring what one "lacks deep inside". One hopes to find these "missing qualities" in him / her. And one hopes to be able to develop those qualities "itself" in the future.
When one has developed these qualities oneself, this one person does not seem to be so attractive anymore and one "thinks" that this relationship is doomed to end. All the exciting things they once did together now seem so boring and people look forward to another relationship, in which they "think" they can grow further. People "think" that they have nothing more to tell each other. By adopting this attitude, one ignores the possibilities that this relationship might still have in store.
This instrument (relationship) is not used as it should be used.
Missing common goal
Failure to use the instrument, or to make poor use of it, has to do with missing a "common goal". We have found a common purpose for ourselves in bringing forth the "Christ" within ourselves. We have begun to consider what the "Christ in man" really means and how we can apply it in a practical way in our own relationship.
Gradually we have also come to see the Christ as a possible instrument, without attaching a definition to it. Defining comes later, initially the common goal is more important. This way you can "together" set all possible goals first. When you have reached one goal, you move on to another goal. You can structure it or not, it doesn't matter. When both partners feel good about it, it's okay.
The joint conversations are the most important nourishment for spiritual growth. We know from experience that when it comes to spirituality, people tend to have inner conversations. So you are, of course, always right. Maybe you will talk to a friend about this topic, but that cannot be compared to the "possibilities" that a "love relationship" has to offer you.
For example, we ourselves talk about all kinds of subjects every day (since we got together in 2005). Our conversations are then a verification for the inner conversations that we have ourselves. We do not conduct these 'conversations with each other' to agree with each other, but to supplement and / or correct each other on certain subjects, which we can then also let go of and take up again in other conversations about the same subject but in a higher vibration.
In this way we continue to push our boundaries. Many limitations disappear and room is freed up for a life in a 'higher consciousness'.
May we already give you some tips for obtaining a nourishing love relationship?
* In the first place, otherwise it will not work. You "must really want" it "both, very important! Don't just assume that your partner doesn't want such a relationship! With this you have your first major topic.
* Be prepared to share and discuss "all" personal secrets (however small) with each other.
* Listen to each other, suppress the urge to blame each other. When you feel those feelings emerge, you can discuss them together. They may arise from past experiences.
* Above all, make "everything" negotiable (taboos do not exist in a true love relationship). Choose topics that interest both partners. These topics can initially be about everyday things (learn to converse!).
* Be sincere, if something doesn't interest you, let each other know. Perhaps the interest will come later and you can still discuss the topic.
* You have to learn to have conversations, give each other time to learn.
* Put aside the thought, "that you have to outdo each other." These thoughts only fuel the competitive struggle that we face every day. They are totally useless, make sure you become aware of this. This topic is already worth talking about.
* At first you may not know what to talk about. Don't worry, make a list or read some of our insights on this site. Plenty of conversation, even if you don't agree with us. You do have a topic, discuss it together and form your own opinion.
* Humor is extremely important. Don't be too serious!
* Take time (daily?) To have conversations with your partner. Sometimes put aside a course or an outing with others to be able to be with your partner. You can also talk while walking or cycling or in the sauna or in bed, or ....
* If, after "repeated invitations to a conversation", your partner does not respond, "this is the most important topic" that "needs" to be discussed. It is this conversation that can shape your future.
Draw your own conclusions.
Eddy and Rita