Before we begin with this insight, let's make it clear that we believe that spirituality has nothing to do with reading the cards, clairvoyance, taking courses, receiving initiations from other people, etc… These are just skills that one can develop. Just as one can learn to paint. One will be able to paint better than the other. Chances are that if you ask someone what spirituality is, they will list the above skills.
Few people will say that spirituality belongs in everyday life. Yet spirituality is not hocus pocus but simply living in the awareness that one is a spiritual being. One has only forgotten it.
If you start with spirituality
Many people wonder if they are spiritual. We believe everyone is spiritual. In our insight "Am I spiritual?" we give a simple trick to see if you are spiritual. It will only take you 5 minutes.
You have to start somewhere
That is the case for everyone. I (Eddy) started to take an interest in spirituality at a young age. I didn't know what it was but it intrigued me. I didn't even call it spirituality. I had no interest in clairvoyance and all those things. I did read a lot of books, by authors like Krishnamurti and many others. I didn't understand much of it, but what I read seemed to be of great value. It was so mysterious, so elusive to me. As I read further I began to understand what was written. I began to take it in and consider what was behind it. I started to get the wisdom. I kept this up for a long time. It seemed like I was wise myself and to some extent I was.
Until Rita and I met
In 2005 we were both 47 years old. I had been into spirituality for at least 25 years. Many books had crossed my path. I had absorbed many wisdoms. I had followed quite a few courses. I had received many initiations from others. I had a spiritual alternative practice as a secondary occupation. Rita was one of my clients who came for treatment. It doesn't take long before we phoned each other every day. The most diverse topics were discussed.
Our conversations lasted longer and longer. Until we found out after a short while that we actually wanted to go through life together. We went to live together 3 months after our first meeting. I quit the practice, got rid of all the books, and burned all my certificates. The old me had to get out. A new refreshing beginning was on the way. Spiritual growth is a bit of dying and being born again. As one evolves further one dies every second to be reborn the next.
The shock of my life
Nice idea, isn't it? Die every time to be born again a second later? Yeah, before I could get that far I had to let the "old me" that I had carefully built up over 25 years die. Did I have to? No, not at all! Who would I need that from? From Rita? Of my own? Someone else's? Maybe from God? It just seemed to be time. It seemed planned. I knew it was supposed to be like that. Now you will undoubtedly understand that it is not easy to let an I that has been built up so carefully, in which so much time, energy and money has been invested, to die. I got the shock of my life.
Before Rita and I went to live together, we had already made a lot of phone calls, now that we lived together there really had to be communication. I didn't even know how. I was amazed at myself that I could hang on the phone for so long. Communication was certainly not my strongest point.
There we sat together at the table. Rita challenged me to communicate. Previously, we had only occasionally talked about spirituality. Our conversations were often about human and also animal behavior. When we moved in together, spirituality naturally also came into play. The crazy part of it all was that with my more than 25 years of experience in gaining spiritual knowledge, I had to give my thumbs up against the simple wisdom that she, who had never been involved in spirituality, had. Another shock.
Get rid of that old me!
It was clear. That old, trusted, proud, pseudo-wise 'I' had to get out. Ok, but how do you get started? How do you put aside a cultivated habit of more than 25 years? Because that's what it is, a habit. A habit of reading, seeking advice from others, using the wisdom of others as if I had invented it myself. Layer upon layer. If you can die and be born again every second, you can also put many layers of wisdom from others over your self. It is a knife that cuts both ways.
So I had collected a thick layer of wisdom from others. And do you know what's so nice? Nobody saw that. Or hardly anyone. If anyone said anything about it, I just waved it away and moved on. Without changing anything. I either ignored that person or said something insignificant that I read somewhere. Enough knowledge, a barrel full.
Nobody saw it except Rita. I hadn't counted on that at all. :o) I thought I was doing well. We talked for hours and we still talk about how we can grow even further, even higher in consciousness. I still feel that book-wisdom I have acquired over 25 years, attracting me. It's still fun to show off with it. Less than before. Fortunately. Less and less. Whenever I respond to others, Rita says “Oh let those people. They know that themselves and otherwise they will sooner or later find out. ” And so it is of course, just like myself, others will find out for themselves and the insight will go much deeper than anyone telling them.
How do you get started?
Now I have not yet told you how to expose that old me and let it die. Just let go, says Rita. Yes, that would be nice. Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way. I had to see the old self clearly first. That was not that easy. It had hidden itself behind all kinds of qualities that could be called good. Altruism, for example. Good intentions. Want to make the world a better place. A great sense of responsibility. And a few more qualities that the old self could hide behind. Why should I put that off in God's name? What's the point of that? Still! Yet I knew that if I wanted to continue in consciousness I would have to die many more times to be born again. Like a phoenix rising fresh from its own ashes. ;o) Nice, isn't it?
Fortunately, Rita was there with her patience and experience to bring me to the point where I could, little by little, detach myself from the book wisdom that so burdened me. Very often she felt that she was pressuring me and let it be known that she did not want to. She saw that I had a hard time pushing me and every time I assured her that she had to keep going. That it was necessary. There was something wrong with the I, which I was then and that could only be exposed with a drastic action. I didn't like it but I never got angry. I looked at what was going on in my mind, how my body reacted, at the path I wanted to take. And when I say I was never angry, I mean that too. Not that I shouldn't get angry. I knew tidying up was necessary and was willing to do a lot for it.
An everlasting challenge
Spirituality is dynamic! It involves an everlasting challenge. An enormous challenge in letting go. Spiritual life means that the life you live suits you. Like a piece of clothing that fits you well. You don't want another. When it goes into the wash you are impatiently waiting to put it back on. You also have to be able to let go of it every second you die in order to be born again. That is the challenge. Loving the life you live, feeling at home in it, wanting to live it on a deep level of awareness. To then let it go. That is the challenge. It's a never ending story.
Eddy and Rita